Are you settling for less than what you deserve?
Intelligent people have their own demons, but together, we can defeat them!
Hello dear friend,
“I’m talented, but I haven’t yet got what I deserve.”
Have you ever said this to a friend, written in your journal, or felt that you’re made for better things (people, jobs, places) that you currently have?
If yes, then you aren’t alone. It’s a thought I deal with constantly. Today, I want to share a reflection I learned from an old edition of James Clear’s 3-2-1 newsletter:
Things that keep talented people from fulfilling their potential:
Trying to please everyone
Imitating the desires of others
Chasing status without questioning why
Playing superhero and trying to do it all alone
Dividing your attention between too many projects.
Let’s take a look at these individually, shall we?
Trying to please everyone
It’s not easy to distinguish between something you’re doing to be nice, and something you only did to get someone’s validation or attention.
For chronic people pleasers, the line gets blurred further.
See, if you look for validation often from others, your talent won’t matter. You’ll design your life according to someone else’s expectations from you.
While that’s isn’t wrong, it’s also a sure-shot way to always settle for less than what you deserve.
Imitating the desires of others
If you’re confused about this one, remember the mantra I live by:
“Don’t take advice from someone who’s living a life you don’t want to live.”
Chasing status without questioning why
This is again, a tough nut to crack.
Growing up, some things are so deeply ingrained in us, that we find it hard to understand if we’re pursuing a goal because our heart wants it, or have we been told by someone that it’s a worthy goal to chase.
I recently wrote an article about the status games I quit to live a truly fulfilled life. You can read it here.
Playing superhero and trying to do it all alone
A few days back, I put up a story on Instagram with Ernest Hemingway’s famous quote,
"Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.”
To this, my friend and Life Coach Dipanshu Rawal replied,
“Also, most intelligent people carry a big ego and don’t want to take help. I call it the “I can do this myself no matter how hard it is” syndrome.”
If you’re talented, it isn’t always easy to acknowledge your limitations and seek help when needed. If you can get past this mental hurdle, you’ll see a lot more new opportunities opening up in front of you.
Dividing your attention between too many projects.
Multi-tasking is a lie. You can never truly “multi” task. All your brain does is quickly switch between multiple tasks, ensuring you can’t focus fully on one, while also getting exhausted quicker.
I’ve written a deep-dive about the science behind it and how you can get ride of your tendency to multi-task. You can read it here.
Hope you liked this week’s message. Note that I create this newsletter for you weekly with lots of love. If you’d like to support me, here’s a link to buy me a book.
If you found this letter useful, don’t forget to forward this to a friend or ask them to sign up for my newsletter. It’s free, and they’ll mostly leave with a smile.
That’s all from my end today. I’ll see you again soon. Till then, stay strong. Keep smiling and be awesome.
With love,
Anangsha.