Your misery might not be related to another person at all
Expectations often set us up for disappointment.
Hello dear friend
A business owner friend of mine is fiercely ambitious. She draws strict professional boundaries and never hesitates to put her foot down when her friendships threaten to come in the way of her work.
As a business owner myself, I acknowledge and appreciate this quality. But as her friend, I also expect some leeway. Like, when I miss a meeting with her, I expect our friendship is strong enough that she’ll reschedule it to some other time.
What I don’t understand that even though I’m her friend, when we’re talking on professional terms, I need to respect her time. If I don’t show up for meetings without informing her earlier, the onus is on me to book another meeting. Expecting her to cut me slack is plain unprofessional.
This was a hard pill to swallow.
Until a few days back, I used to hold grudges every time she made me pay for a meeting I didn’t show up to. I thought it was rude of her to not honor our friendship.
“Sometimes we find it hardest to accept in others that which we cling to in ourselves.”
Reading this quote by Brandon Sanderson made me look inside.
When people book consultation calls with me, I put in my hundred percent to be present for them, physically and mentally. A no-show is a huge turn off. All my effort and preparation goes to waste, and I feel it’s fair to charge them even if they don’t show up.
If I do the same, how can I expect my friend to bend the rules for me?
Doing business with friends is not the best idea, I know, but having strict boundaries is the only way to go about it. As an ambitious person myself, I understand my friend better now, and try my best to respect her time more.
Not having any expectations from her has eased our relationship, and also removed any bitterness that might have inadvertently crept up from my side.
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That’s all from my end today. I’ll see you again soon. Till then, stay strong. Keep smiling and be awesome.
With love,
Anangsha.